Questions

Why is it that when we are hurt our first instinct is to draw back?? Why is it easier to fall into a pattern of bitterness and resentment than it is to confront our hurts? i will not deny that bitterness has driven many to success, but is that the kind of success i want? Why is it so easy to question myself and my worth because i feel you dont get it? why do we turn our backs on those who loves us to seek the affection of those who dont? are we so greedy that the love of those who have been faithful and genuine becomes old and stale and we spurn it for the chance of love from the one who doesn't acknowledge you? is it really serving if i do it in the hope that you will notice? why must you love me for me to know that God loves me? Why must you see me for me to know that i can fulfill my purpose? why is your approval necessary for me to know God's approval. Why?

And if i couldnt fail...

This is a blog challenge set up by the masterful phoenix ages ago and this is my somewhat delayed response.... the challenge is what would you do if you knew you couldnt fail...

This morning while i was taking a shower this question would not escape my mind. (i know that at this point you are still amazed that i shower but come on.. move past that its only twice a week). so what would i do if i couldnt fail...

i would write a song that moves grown men to tears.
in 1992 i watched Michael Jackson in bucharest and one of the images that has stayed with me since is the sight of fully grown men crying. I would love to write a song that shares in the emotions of men. their joys sorrows and hopes, encapsulated in one song. the way a national anthem moves men- thats the song i would write.

i would write a speech that inspires a nation.
Great men have said great things and even greater men have arisen because they were inspired by the beliefs of these great men. Men like Martin Luther King, Woodrow Wilson, Marc Anthony and many more. These are men who spoke their beliefs and shaped the world around them.

The world celebrates many great men, i would love to be the one that told Churchill not to give in, the man who walked by Ghandi's side as he took salt from the sea, the man who embraced Mandela as he began his Long Walk To Freedom, the man who looked into a little boys eyes and saw Wolfgang Mozart. To be Jonathan's armour bearer. Although these men are celebrated world over, i defy you to find any one who has found greater fulfillment in these icons success than the men who stood beside them.

And if i couldn't fail, i would inspire men to greatness. and that will be my everest.. my waterloo... my citizen Kane.. my such a time as this.

The Prodigal returns

critics call it the least updated blogs since blogs began. i call it the home i miss and long for. i miss my blogger community you guys are just aces. we listen, love and laugh. i apologise for not being a productive mamber of society for a while, but let this be the last apology, the prodigal is returned and is anxious for the embrace of family.

clover, phoenix, matt, sarah and all you crazy bloggers lets party like its october 2006