To Be or Not To Be.. a MAN

hey kids...


Esse Quam Videri simply means To Be rather than to Seem. i read this, this morning on Debatable Strands of Wisdom.. a blog packed with profound knowledge by Pheonix. havent been able to shake the thought. This coincides so well with the things going on in my life at the minute. The highlight of this week is definitely thursday night.. when we will be discussing what it is or takes to be a man. have been trying to read "wild at heart" by john eldridge it starts by contending that men have lost the adventurous side of their nature.. we have lost the age old cave man within us and have been turned waterd down by the females around us. (in a not so blame women for everything kinda way). but it is true now men are more sensitive.. more domesticated shall we say.. there are huge disparities between the men of taday and fred flintstone or the idea of manliness he portrays. eldridge reminds us (men) of our formative years when we were boys and our hearts desire was to play with toy guns, be dangerous, drive fast cars, climb trees, wrestle.basically all the things that we dont now do. over time the things we do have changed but does that mean our desires have changed??? does that mean that we dont find fast cars and a wild on the edge life attractive anymore???

we have become domesticated which is cool, more responsible also commendable but if i am honest with myself, i long to live on the edge. i long to live a life that isnt predictable a hint of danger but we ave been taught to tone that down and become more acceptable to society. it sounds a bit muddled but that best explains my thoughts at the minute.

i chatted extensively (alright emailed back and forth) with a wise princess the other day and was shocked and pleased that the conversation took on the shape of my musings. she indirectly spoke of things being as they seem not as they are... i quote

I know so many amazing girls who are FAB when just with other girls (being completely themselves) and then go all funny and serious and super spiro when guys around. It’s weird…if they were THEMSELVES all the time….hmmm, its interesting this whole boy/girl thing…it actually really fascinates me…behaviors ect

this is an issue i hope to take up later but i will pause here and let you comment on what you think?? so far

Beliefomatic quiz

hey i did that quiz too. you answer questions and it aligns you up to what religion they think best suits you. it is with regret that i inform all my Hillsong buddies that s of now... i will be an orthodox quaker. it shows you by percentages what religion best suits you and here are my results...


1.
Orthodox Quaker (100%)
2.
Mainline to Liberal Christian Protestants (99%)
3.
Mainline to Conservative Christian/Protestant (92%)
4.
Seventh Day Adventist (81%)
5.
Eastern Orthodox (74%)
6.
Roman Catholic (74%)
7.
Liberal Quakers (74%)
8.
Reform Judaism (70%)
9.
Unitarian Universalism (65%)
10.
Islam (58%)
11.
Orthodox Judaism (58%)
12.
Sikhism (54%)
13.
Bahá'í Faith (52%)
14.
Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (Mormons) (47%)
15.
Neo-Pagan (38%)
16.
Christian Science (Church of Christ, Scientist) (37%)
17.
Secular Humanism (36%)
18.
New Age (35%)
19.
New Thought (35%)
20.
Hinduism (34%)
21.
Scientology (34%)
22.
Nontheist (33%)
23.
Taoism (32%)
24.
Mahayana Buddhism (29%)
25.
Theravada Buddhism (29%)
26.
Jainism (25%)
27.
Jehovah's Witness (24%)

Blog Challenge

The Challenge is interesting....
Write a character profile for yourself if you had lived in medieval times.

Havent read too many medieval bolos but here goes.

Name.. Tate of Torongo

Physical Characteristics: Tall serf (in the middle ages serfs were the lowest echelon of society. The system work from the king and downward... The king gave his nobles or "fiefs" land in exchange for them supplying him with men for his armies. The fiefs then allowed poor peasants or "serfs" to live on the land and work it but they had to fight his wars and he would protect them. Guess who paid attention in histoty)

Tate of Torongo lives under the brutal lordship of lord Thisguysucks. A young hothead intent on become the kings most trusted noble. As a result he volunteers Tate of Torongo and the rest of the poor decent hard working people on his land for every war.. Including this one.. The most brutal. The war between the king and Lord Longswords from the deepest darkest parts of the forest. Longswords opposes the king and appeals to the masses because he will replace the current system and the serfs would have more liberty.. More freedom. So Tate of Torongo likes this dude but Thisguysucks is commanding us to battle him. Also in this time period the law of La Prima Nocte or The Right of The First Night still exists.. The law simply and cruelly states that should any serf get married, his lord is entitled to the first night with the new bride. A law that revulsed society and some lords never practiced but Thisguysucks was really keen on my fiancee who I was due to marry in a few weeks. All the more reason for me to want to see this system toppled.

Using his limited influence Tate of Torongo oragnises his fellow serfs to revolt against Thisguysucks and the king. He organises clandestine (I just really wanted to use that word) meetings in barns and any place where privacy could be found and as a community they plan the sabotage of their lord and his lands. Before long the moment of battle arrives and the people turn on their lord and join in with lord longswords.

Just as victory was in sight, out of the forest came the kings fortified army and they easily defeated the revolutionary forces. Clearly there was an informer in their midst for there was no way the king could have known what was going down and on what side of the fence we stood.

As the people get rounded up and put in torture cells the king comes down to congratulate Tate of Torongo and offere him a Lordship. Yes that's true the man that started the revolution turned on his own people at the prospect of riches and providing for his soon to be bride. The king granted Tate of Torongo vast lands and riches.. But on the first night of his marriage as he prepared to enjoy the blessings of marriage his new wife stuck a knife through his heart and watched him bleed to death.

As he bled she cried
You were my all, my king , my warrior.
Nothing could make me happier than being your wife,
I have longed to be yours for as long as I've had life.
Always your wife, never your queen,
What do all these castles and horses mean?
They mean you have forgotten who you are in pursuit of whats not yours.
You have sold your neighbours for a seat at the table of the king..
He broke their bones and with it my heart..
You were my heart and so you had to die.

And as he bled she cried
You were my all, my king, my warrior, my traitor.

And as he breathed his last breath, and life left his soul. He saw her turn the knife on herself...


think I lost the point halfway through but that was fun

Wonderings

Hey my people...

Just had the most amazing realisation.. My parents have been here for the past 4 weeks. and yesterday after a said goodbye to them i realised how much i admired my dad, and that he is my hero. i want to be the man he is.. secure in wo he is with a huge loving heart.

Kinda going through a phase in my life at the moment. its a mixture of confusion and something else i can not now describe. i feel i am taking shape and form but the metamorphisis of mind and charater can be a strange procedure. Obviously my recent break up with a truly special girl (we are still friends if that interests you at all) figures into my current phase but also my parents returning home brings about a longing for home, a longing for familiarlarity.. things are changing too fast. also i have had to reconsider my opinion of people as a whole. i have always been of the opinion that people are good beneath all the facades and their conciense (big spelling mistake but i have neither the desire nor the energy to use the spellcheck for a word i know like the the top of my keyboard) but recently i have been subject to and witness of some of humanity's less flattering sides and so i conclude that all men are in essence bad and their conscience dead, but God is good and if he dwells in men then they are good. Because in God good is not descriptive character trait, it is Nature. so wherever Goodness exists God exists whether we acknowledge it or not...

Just very recently broke up with my girlfriend ... life kinda sucks. getting over a relationship is really hard.. but i will be alright